Time Warp

I had my first callback interview yesterday in the city. The days leading up to it were pure hell. I was having such bad anxiety attacks. I seriously considered going to the health center and trying to get some xanax or something. I called an the advice nurse told me I would have to get a counseling appointment and then maybe a psychiatrist. Having procrastinated until the day before I knew that wasn't going to happen in one day.

So I resigned myself to having a bad stomache ache and constant worrying. After the interview, I can't believe I made myself so nervous. It wasn't bad at all. But I still don't know how well I did.

I went to bed early on Thursday but it was no use. I tossed and turned all night trying to go over interview answers in my head. I woke up Friday and went through the routine. I tried forcing myself to eat a scrambled egg and piece of toast but I always feel nauseaous when eating so early. I double checked that I had all my interview materials and went and bought a power bar and a can of redbull. I wish I had eaten the stupid power bar.

My BART ride was uneventful. I was a little nervous because it was only my 2nd time riding and I was paranoid about missing my stop but I found it alright and the directions I printed on mapquest led me straight to the building. The offices were on the 31st floor and I actually met a fellow Boalt student in the elevator. Damn! More competition.

The ladies at the reception desk were so cute. They were these 2 old ladies and they were super nice. I hope I can have a secretary like that one day. They gave me this huge folder that had all this stuff about the firm and my interview schedule.

I had 4 attorney interviews, plus an interview with the recruitment coordinator. Then I had a lunch with 2 additional associates who were younger and newer to the firm. Basically, it was the same format for interviewing as I had done on campus, except they were now 30 minute interviews instead of 20.

I stumbled right off the bat when I was interviewed by the recruiting coordinator.
Normally it's an associate or partner, so when they ask "Do you have any questions..." all of my questions are geared towards working there as an attorney. I hadn't prepared questions for the coordinator. Obviously she knows about the firm but it's in a completely different capacity. So after fumbling a bit I asked her some questions about the summer program. I also fumbled a bit when I was explaining why I had done my Holocaust minor.

Then it was time to pass me off to the next attorney. I got to see different parts of the office which was cool. The coordinator said it was like going in a time machine because different parts of the office are being remodeled so some look like they were styled in the late 80's.

The next interview went well. Except my stomach started grumbling. Damn! Why me? That damn power bar was laughing at me. So I quickly took a gulp of water hoping my stomach would quiet down. Fortunately it wasn't too bad. This attorney was one of the hiring partners and after the interview as we were walking to the next office he told me that I was asking good questions. So I hope that's a good sign.

The next interview was uneventful. I can't remember much of what we talked about.

Then I had a woman attorney who was a corporate partner. She was a lot of fun and we talked briefly about Wicked and theater in San Francisco. I think I had a good connection with her and there were no major stumbles.

The last guy threw me a little because he kept asking me for experiences that I found challenging and how I dealt with them. I'm not sure if I gave him the answer I was looking for but finally it was lunch and the end was in site.

The 2 younger attorneys took me to this alley across the street. It was literally this little alley crammed with several small restaurants and patio tables. We chose the Italian restaurant. It was so expensive and I knew the firm was paying but I still wanted to be careful about what I ordered. Finally I decided that the ravioli looked safe. It wasn't too expensive and I figured I could eat it without getting it all over myself. The only problem was that it was portebello mushroom and goat cheese and I usually don't eat mushrooms. I'm glad I ordered it because it was so good!

Keeping in mind that lunch was also an interview of sorts, I asked questions about transitioning from law school to work and life at the firm.

My mom thinks I'm being overly critical of myself but I'm still worried. The rejection letters keep rolling in and I don't know what I'm doing wrong with my interviews. I spoke with the career development office but it might as well have been an office filled with monkeys throwing poo because they were no help.

Hopefully I will hear back sometime next week. Now I need to send thank you notes and I can't decide whether I should just send emails (which they say is acceptable) or send handwritten notes. This crap is hard!

I also confirmed another callback interview with this other firm. I definitely prefer the first firm but at least it's something to fall back on. This 2nd interview will be easier because it's only 1 interview, but the interview is for an hour.

In other news, I waited too long to buy my stupid plane ticket to San Diego so now prices have gone up. I need to do that ASAP so I don't have to spend anymore. I also learned that I may not be able to get some funding as previously told by the queer caucus.

Blah! My only joy today is learning that all the reading for my conflict of laws class next week are cases that I read last year in Civil Procedure so I'm not going to reread them. Yay!