Rollercoaster

This past week has been such a huge emotional rollercoaster. I think I experienced every emotion possible.

On monday I was a nervous wreck because bar exam results were to be released the following day. But it was also my brother's birthday. So after not getting much done at work we had a nice dinner at home.

That night I had a nightmare that I went to check my test results online and couldn't find my name. And so I did a CTRL+F search to see if it was hiding somewhere else and I couldn't see it. Which would mean I failed.

So Tuesday I was even more anxious. The partner in our firm who wrote one of the questions told me he usually got the list an hour early. So I tried to focus on work but still ended up getting nothing done.

Two rolls around and no word yet. I was over by his secretary's desk and asked if she heard anything and she hadn't. I went back to my office and waited. 15 minutes later, there's a knock on the door and the secretary pokes her head in and gives me the thumbs up. I couldn't believe it.

I asked her if that meant that I passed and she said yes. And she handed me a printout of the list. I had to check it, just in case she was playing a really mean prank. But lo and behold, there was my name on the list.

I passed the Nevada Bar Exam. I felt so bad about it, I was certain that I failed. What a yucky feeling.

So then I was super excited and happy about that.

The rest of the week seemed to fly by. I got to participate in an arbitration. The partner from our firm did the cross-examination of the plaintiff, but then he let me do all of the questioning/cross-examining of our witnesses. It was a great experience, even if I was nervous about messing up. But I think it went well.

Then to cap off the week of weird emotions, we decided that it was time to put one of our dogs down. We had Misty for 13 years and she was just going down hill. It came to the point where she was really struggling to breath and she could barely lift herself off the floor or get up again. So I braced myself for that on Friday but we decided to hold off and see what would happen over the weekend.

Things didn't improve, so we took her to the vet this afternoon. I hate losing pets. I can't even imagine what parents feel like when they lose their kids, if this is how bad it feels when a pet dies.

Now that I'm emotionally drained, I've decided to do something rather foolish and I'm going to sign up to take the California bar exam in February. Yes, because I didn't hate the NV bar enough, I need to do it again.

At least I know what to expect.